A good Father's Day sermon. Not only for men, but for women as well. I admit I certainly never noticed how David was an uninvolved father to his sons, Despite this and other indiscretions, he still was a man after God's own heart. That says a lot about our God.
Pastor Paul Hanson told us David never molded, disciplined nor restored his children. He grieved for them, but never offered the support his sons (and no doubt daughters) needed.
Children need love, respect and attention. David never even asked of his sons, "Why do you behave as you do?" He was totally uninvolved. We all need these three vital components in our lives and they need to come from our father. If it is not received, children become desperate for approval. They look for attention and sometimes do it in very negative ways (the reason so many are in prison...or in the case of daughters, promiscuity). Sometimes you'll see a lack of respect for all authority.
An uninvolved father makes a child bitter and even vengeful. A child will begin to take on the attitude of providing for and becoming their own self. What do I need a father for, they might ask when they are really hungry for approval.
This touched my heart because I had an uninvolved father. I can remember secretly wanting to be an architect like he was. I was in eighth grade at that time. But I was unable to express that desire. Even my first husband always wanted Dad to talk to him about his work, but Dad remained silent.
Later I struck out of my secretarial role and worked as an offset press operator. Then I was determined to do what in our company had been, for the most part, a man's job--becoming an appraiser, traveling the United States, setting up and meeting with clients, even being a project manager on many jobs. There had to have been a underlying reason for that. I wanted to do things that would get his attention so he (and Mom) would be proud of me, seeing what I had done on my own. I did this even though Dad had brought himself to a place in his life where interaction with him was no longer something I desired. I never got the word I so badly wanted from him. But the story doesn't end here.
I know there are many men who have not had a positive type of interaction with their father. A father is someone boys, and girls, look up to or should be able to look up to. Being emotionless and distant has its drawbacks, creates a child in need. On a side note, there are certainly next to no good father influences on television these days. They're all buffoons. And children, unfortunately, are watching...and "learning."
Sadly, in David's life, he was never able to restore his relationship with his sons, even though he had a great relationship with his Heavenly Father.
That's where I'm headed, of course. Jesus lived on this earth as a human, feeling the same griefs we all have gone through. He took all those things with Him to the cross where they were nailed on that tree along with His body. His body was broken for us, as we might be broken in spirit. The cross is where we can go to receive the love, respect and attention of our God in heaven. But that's why so many are unwilling to receive God's love...because they equate our Heavenly Father with their earthly father. They cannot believe someone they are not able to see could take away the grief and sorrow caused by an uninvolved father. They will live broken lives in the meantime...
Let me tell you...I may not be a son, but I was a daughter. Dad and I were estranged, mainly my choice because of his actions. But like I said, the story doesn't end here. I've brought this up before...just months before my Dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's I received Christ as Lord and Savior. And I know without a shadow of a doubt this was God's hand at work. Had I not known Jesus at that time, I would have continued to uninvolve myself with Dad. I would probably have lived the rest of my life without any sort of restoration. I may have forever grieved not having had some sort of relationship.
But God...through my relationship with Jesus Christ, through the love of my Heavenly Father, I was able to restore that relationship, as best as possible because of the circumstances, with Dad. And that was the sole purpose of Jesus coming to earth...to restore our relationship with God. Without God we have no Heavenly Father. We are separated, eternally, if we never swallow our pride and receive Him so that we might return to that original state God intended for us.
He is always available. We are His children and He grieves the separation. He grieves more than we can even imagine. We are, in His eyes, Fatherless...and we are broken. He loves us so much but sometimes we turn away because we can only imagine the hurt we carry in our own hearts over the lack of love from our earthly father.
Only Jesus is able to heal that hurt, take away the sting of rejection, bring love back in...even after the fact. He takes brokenness and turns it into restoration. He gives us the ability to forgive. Believe that it's true.
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