Friday, August 26, 2011

Heartbeat of God


Hebrews 10:25 - ...not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching. 

An appropriate verse for today. Settles the spirit for a few things I've felt all week. This scripture popped up in my email this morning. God's timing is always perfect.

There is something wonderful about Thursday nights. It's a time of gathering at church for a small group of us. We are in prayer for whatever the Lord puts on our hearts. We pray for the recovery ministry that is taking place that night. We pray for the church. And quite often God will speak to each of us...and sometimes it is a confirmation of the words given to some of the others. An assembling, exhorting one another...

Last night was no different. I had not been there for a couple weeks having other things going on. I went sensing a bit of trepidation! Yes! Yet, there is something so comforting as we gather in the sanctuary. The world is outside those doors, but we are hunkered in with the Spirit of God hovering over us.

I have had a dry week or so spiritually. And as is usual, instead of pressing in with God, sorting it out with Him, asking for His help, I feel ashamed and back away instead. I find things, or there just are things, to occupy my time keeping me "busy" enough to be delinquent with my quiet time. Oh, how I hate that! I really do.

I think it started when I missed church last week to be part of a women's golf event/tournament. I was disappointed it started earlier than usual Sunday. I signed up thinking I would have time for church first. I missed church and missed the Lord. 

But the Lord is merciful and gracious. I felt I had distanced myself from Him...and that feeling of shame came over me. But last night, as I felt so unworthy to receive from the Lord, He showed up. I shared my struggle with a friend and she said she has times like that too. We need to talk, was the solution. But of course my busyness is preventing even that. Arrggghh.

What does it feel like when you have received the Lord into your heart and momentarily, in the grand scheme of things, slip away from His presence? It's an empty feeling. Nothing one does feels like it's worth anything. The idea that we are nothing without Him is so true. If one does not feel that, I wonder if they really know Him?

I looked for solace in little things that had absolutely no meaning and offered little satisfaction. I wandered aimlessly. You hear Him calling for you but there's that idea that you aren't worthy to return...or is it pride that causes us to hold back? There is a popular song where the chorus is You never let go, You never let go, You never let go. And He doesn't.

There is an emptiness in our lives...because we have pushed the Lord out. There is a lack of peace because our Prince of Peace has been ignored. Oh, people, we are NEVER worthy enough to be in His presence but God...is merciful because of His Son Jesus. If there are those who think they need to clean up their act, sort of what I was feeling, before receiving Christ or being in God's presence, that idea is a lie. He wants us as we are...dirty, shameful, arrogant, prideful, and lost.

He knows us. He knows what we are but knows what we can be when we let Him clean us up. There is no shame, but what we feel. That shame is the door to our freedom if we allow it to be seen by the Lord and then removed by His tender mercies. It only takes admission of our faults and sins.

Reminders popped into my head. He calls us into relationship with Him. He loves us more than we can imagine (another song I think!). Even to the most unlovable person His love is strong. He waits, like the father of the prodigal son, for us to return...even if it's only been a short while. His arms are always open to take us back.

When He is not alongside the things we do there is a hollowness. Why? Because we are not doing for the Lord. Everything we do should be to honor and glorify Him. We should be doing to please Him with what talents He has given us.

I prayed last night that the Holy Spirit would come upon our church like a huge blanket. We feel comfortable and secure wrapped up. His blanket over us would bring comfort, security and safety. The chorus of another song pierced my heart: in His presence, that's where I am strong.

Oh, that's it. In His continual presence. First thought in the morning, thoughts all throughout the day and the last thought as we enter our rest at night. The words heartbeat of God came to me. I didn't feel a need to understand what that meant, but if we are in His presence, closely tied to His Spirit, we should be able to hear His heartbeat. It should be a comfort to us, it should remind us of the safety we have in Him and the security we have if we acknowledge Him in all we do...if we make the time for Him.

As we gathered together after individual prayer another person was reminded that although  her prayers for others were a good thing, she was neglecting her time alone with Him. A confirmation for all of us of the need to find that time to be in His presence...and sometimes to just sit and listen for Him to speak instead of always coming with a list of things. Be still and know I am God, she said He reminded her.

Thank You, Lord, for Your words of truth mixed with love and mercy. Today is a new day and I will rejoice and be glad in it.

So what did Oswald Chambers have to say today?? Are you ever disturbed? ...inner peace is impossible unless it is received from Jesus. ...it is a peace which comes from looking into His face and realizing His undisturbedness. How do we realize this when we take our eyes off Him, are out of His presence? We get disturbed because we have not been considering Him. Lay it all out before Him, and in the face of difficulty, bereavement and sorrow, hear Him say, "Let not your heart be troubled." I had lost my peace.

Yes, taking our eyes off Him causes distress, even a sorrow we don't always associate with our being out of His presence. The heartbeat of God should be ever present as we do life. All He wants is to let us know that in all things we can have peace in Him.

Praise God He never lets us go unless we are determined to ignore His gentle Spirit coaxing us to return because He chose us and He loves us. The days are growing short for His return. The days are experiencing more and more worldly disasters. If we don't have our Peace beside us now, we may be so shaken as to fall into the hands of our enemy. Listen for the heartbeat of God. If you hear it respond. If you don't, begin to listen for it and respond. He is only a heartbeat away from receiving. We should realize He only wants good for us.

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

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